Second Amendment Trial Gets Wild!
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Second Amendment Trial Gets Wild!

October 23, 2019

♪♪[audience cheering]– As we all know, the North American grizzly is
a noble and majestic creature that should be protected
and treasured. Not experimented on
like that done by Dr. Muller. – I have become a legal citizen
of ze United States, therefore my genetic
alterations are protected– Nay, encouraged
by ze Constitution. – That is preposterous. Your Honor, the people move–Dr. Muller: You cannotdeny me
my Second Amendment rights! – What does the right to bear
arms have to do with this case? – You tell me. It’s like ze lawyer man said,
“I have ze right to bear arms.” – The Founding Fathers
clearly meant that as the right to own guns. – Bear arms means own guns? So what does lion legs mean? Rent knives? – Your Honor, please– – I mean, bear arms
is quite ambiguous and either could be used
to defend oneself. – Use context clues. Firearms are clearly
the superior means of defense. – [growls] – Whoa, whoa! – I feel quite safe, Your Honor. Hahaha! – Okay, the defendant should
not be allowed to push me. – I didn’t push you. I pressed you. – Fine, he should not be
allowed to press me. – First Amendment! Freedom of the press! Dr. Muller’s making some
very compelling arguments. Also, I want a bear-armed
bailiff myself. – Your Honor, please. If Dr. Muller wins this case,
any fool on the street can go get transplanted bear arms. – Ja, and if ze lawyer man wins then people will be allowed to
inspect my pockets as I convulse on the floor. – What? – Fourth Amendment! Protection from unreasonable
searches and seizures. [judge laughing] – That Dr. Muller is woke. Unfortunately, we’ll never
quite know what the Founding Fathers
truly intended unless… – I brought my time machine
set to 1776. [laughing] [machine hissing]– George Washington?– Salutations, gentlemen. – You know, actually, this will
perfectly help my case. Can you please show the court
your arms? – Uh, why certainly.Lawyer: Well, well, well.No bear arms.No further arguments,
Your Honor. – Ah, well that’s because
I have this. – Ahh. – Most of the Founding Fathers
had bear arms, but I exercised my right
to bear feet, which I use to paddle
across the Delaware with at record speeds. – Ja, well, unfortunately
the current Second Amendment only allows for bear arms. – What? Madison is going to be ticked. Hey, Madison. Apparently, you no longer
have the right to bear face. – [growling][audience laughing][gavel pounding][audience cheering]– Sank you for vatching
zis video. Please, subscribe
to ze channel. Like ze channel. Share it with your friends,
and comment below on an amendment you would like
added to ze Constitution. Stephen? – The right to meet Billy Joel. – Ah, yes. That would be–
– Billy get out there. – All right.
– The people need you.

Only registered users can comment.

  1. You have the Constitutional right to comment and subscribe!

    Who’s side are you on—lawyer Stephen or bear-armed Jason?

  2. i am so gonna miss Jason, he was such a cool guy and really funny! it's like a family member has disowned me…

  3. I'm starting to think google has mind reading powers, I was thinking about bear arms just yesterday as a joke and this appears in my feed… this is so random xD

  4. Every part of this is hilarious but somehow the thing that really gets me is that the revolution wasn't even over in 1776, and the constitution wouldn't be written for like ten years, much less the amendments xD

  5. I have made this point in class but everybody laughed well who’s laughing now.
    Edit: I’m the one laughing.

  6. Hey Studio C I heard u were having auditions to be an extra, is this true? If so I would love to audition, do u have to be a specific age.

  7. Are you guys still doing compilations? It is the season for weddings. You have Ann Withers and Kyle weddings, the photo extravaganza of the witch at the wedding, mormon misunderstandings… shall I continue? Any other fun compilations anyone can think of?

  8. Boris to Dmitri:
    "In America, you right to bear arms
    "In Soviet Russia, you have right TO WHOLE BEAR"

  9. The right to refuse to put pineapple on pizza. (This would be for those making pizza) No pineapple pizzas in MY AMERICA.

  10. I know this is supposed to satirical and I respect Studio C more than I do SNL because Studio C is funnier. However, "I have brought my time machine and set it to 1776" is inaccurate because the constitution wasn't even a thing until 1793

  11. The Constitution was written in 1789–but this is still one of the best Studio c sketches of all time!!

  12. Why aren't you guys at five million already! I have been trying to get ppl to like and subscribe nobody listens to me. LOL

  13. If you hate the U.S. Constitution that much . . . MOVE! Renounce your citizenship, become a Tory, and move to a country that fits your political bias views.

  14. The right to impeach the speaker of the house. Currently there is no process in place . . . and therefore no motivation to work.

  15. I don't even want to know what John Hancock had the right to…

    (Edit:) Two likes that will get the ball rolling…

  16. The sad thing is, the judge in this skit thinks exactly like the Supreme Court. If you get right down to it, you can only own firearms as part of a well regulated militia. Since 99.9% of the population is not that because we have a professional military, nobody qualifies.

  17. We have the right to promote good water! You have the right of drinking that good water titled Dasani!

    We sponsored this ;).

  18. Awesome, but don't you mean 1787? Amendments are in the Constitution, not the Declaration of Independence

  19. The kind of joke some dumb 5th grader would make when learning about the amendments, and everyone would look at him like "you're a retard," and he would regret saying it later

  20. I hate to be that guy but the constitution wasn’t written until 1787 and it wasn’t ratified until 1788. So setting the time machine to 1776 wouldn’t make any sense, we hadn’t even won the war yet.

  21. I know this is comedy. However, for the information of the one individual who takes the content of this comedy sketch literally I have a few things to tell you. Many words have what are known as "legal definitions". These definitions are what the words mean in a legal document, court of law, or other applicable circumstance. "Right", "bare", "arms", "press", and "seizures" all have such full legal definitions. Also, the reasoning behind the wording of the constitution and bill of rights is well documented. For example, the second amendment is specifically discussed in The Federalist Papers No. 29 and 46. These sections were written by Alexander Hamilton and James Madison respectively. I still thoroughly enjoyed the sketch.

  22. This skit offended my childhood thoughts
    I'd like to bring up the third amendment to keep this from happening both in the past, present and future

    I will take my thought as being my quarters and you are not allowed in them without my permission which you will never have.

    Therefore I find this skit unconstitutional even though I thought the same way as a kid while transitioning to the Constitution without explanation

    How dare anyone think the same way I do SMH did🤦..hmmph I'm up in arms about this 🤷

    And therefore I dub myself king of myself and demand royalties on anything I've ever thought by anybody who's ever spoke

  23. But they don't always work in your favor. I was luring soldiers into my home and cutting them in pieces before someone pointed out to me that the Third Amendment prohibits the quartering of soldiers in private homes during peace times.

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